Stressing

Yesterday Sam went to look at "motorcycles" and ended up coming home with one. It's a Ninja Z6XR? I think. Anyway it's lime green and really fast. He took me for a short ride to the video store on it. I was okay on the way there, but I prayed for safety the entire ride home. I was terrified. I'm not really a motorbike kind of person. But yeah, it's gonna end up costing us like $16,000.00 at the most, $9,000.00 at the least. But still, Sam makes under $17,000.00 a year. Ugh!!! And I thought he didn't spend enough time at home before.

On top of that I feel like I am coming into a delayed post pardem depression. I think it's too long after my pregnancy to technically call it that, but that's what it feels like. I have been having all of these paranoias and aggressive feelings, not toward the baby, but toward myself. It's like I can't keep the house clean enough, the laundry is never ending, I want to help with the income, but I don't want to lose time spent with my family... :-P

I miss having a best friend under 10 minutes away from me. I've been slowly but surely making more friends out here, but none of them compare to Kathy. I don't want to replace her, I just want someone I can call any time and be completely comfortable with, and get away with when I need to get away. I miss my best buds from VA too. :-(

On a happy note, it was in the mid seventies a few days ago, I layed out by the pool and got a tan, it was awesome. Oh, another happy thing... I submitted a poem to a poetry contest and it's in the semi-finals and people want to publish it in a book! I'm honored. It's so cool. 

Austin is three months old now. He can shake a rattle and get on his knees, like he's going to crawl, but he doesn't moves his arms, so he just ends up doing a wheel barrel sort of thing. He can sit for just under twenty seconds, and he's trying to roll over from his back to his front, but he gets stuck on his arm. He's been able to roll over from tummy to back for some time now. I love him!

Recently I began a bible study, actually just last Thursday. There's really no one my age in it, but that's alright, I get along with older people anyway. Plus not too many people my age have kids, so I can relate with people with a few more years than me.

Hopefully my Tricare Prime (The insurance that will fully cover me) kicks in soon, and I can get tested for allergies, and see a psychatrist, and go to the dentist! I think that will make a few things slightly less stressful. :-)

Hope everyone who reads this is doing well, if you're reading it and haven't written in a while, write something! I like to hear about your lives too. And for those of you who do write, keep it up! :-)

Ugh!

I'm coming down with a cold, it's icky. I'm just praying that I don't get Austin sick. On our way home from Northern California, Sam and I got into a small car accident. We were crossing an overpass and a car cut us off. It was raining so the roads were wet. Sam hit the brakes and told me to hold on. The brakes locked up and Sam counter steered us toward and enbankment, we went up it spun around and cam back down. The car almost flipped but we got lucky. Sam and Austin were fine. I got a slight whiplash. Today I found out that Sam may get deployed next Friday. I'll be in Wisconsin when he finds out for sure on Tuesday and I won't be back until after he leaves if he leaves. I'm not too happy about that but there's really nothing I can do. I'm excited to see my family and friends at least.


COMMENTS:
rossbert wrote:

Dec. 31st, 2004 08:32 am (local)

Poor girl.

Look me up when you're around?

Running On Low

I was suppose to be done babysitting for one of the two families I babysit for last week and I am scheduled into next week. It's my own fault and it's really not horrible because I need the money and I don't mind helping someone out, but there are reasons that I decided to give my notice. One of those reasons is that I can't sleep the night before I have to watch these kids. Last night I got four hours of sleep, I am a robot. I'm having dinner at the Manning's house for the second night in a row. Sam isn't the happiest with me because I drove our car into a small river... Not really, it was just a road that was incredibly flooded. I failed to notice something amiss and yeah, things that are not suppose to get water in them got water in them. That'll teach me to go out driving during tropical storms. My cousin was born August 9th. It's cool. My baby and my cousin are going to be born the same year. One of my baby showers is this Saturday. I'm SO excited. I'm not really expecting anything. I'm just glad I'll have a bunch of my Virginia friends in one place at one time. Sam hasn't ever really thrown a party inviting a bunch of my girl friends. It's always his navy buddies. Not that I mind them a ton... just a little. Especially last Friday night! They were driving me nuts! Sam decided to invite a "few" people over at 10:30pm and nobody was going to get really drunk or anything, so what happens? There's like 12 people in our apartment, someone waving their knife around outside, and a fridge full of beer and no food. Oy! I shouldn't complain too much. Sam has been great for this whole month, and when I say great I mean helping with housework, seeming interested in me and things having to do with the baby, and other stuff. I've liked being around him. Hopefully the car is fixed soon and he can stop stressing about that. As for me, finding an apartment in Cali and booking hotels along the way is what I need to be worrying about.

**EDIT:(8/16/10)

I realize now Sam was probably SO ticked about the dumb car cuz he was worried about visiting his girlfriend who lived in Richmond, two hours away.  *END EDIT

COMMENTS:
mychrysalis wrote:

Aug. 16th, 2004 05:29 pm (local)

Just so you know, Rocco, Kris, and Renee all agree that it's entirely not your fault that you drove through a deeper-than-you-realized puddle and there is no reason for your husband to be mad at you about it. And your shower will be kick-ass, as much as a baby shower can be kick-ass.

What Just Happened?!

**EDIT:8/1/2009
I concieved Austin 2-4 day before this entry.
End EDIT*

Wow- I've had a crazy week... What am I saying? I always have crazy weeks. When are my weeks not crazy? Well anyway, what can I say? I have had the best and worst times this week. I called my friend Shannon twice because I was devastated for reasons I don't think I can recall, oh yes, Sam was playing playstation rather than paying attention to me, and it was more than I could handle. Why am I so pathetic?

Alright, last night there wasn't the usual posse of Navy Boys at my apartment. I thought that I was sick of them, but really I missed the excitement of drunken sailors falling around my living place. I had a nice night watching a semi-serious/comedic movie. (Matchstick Men) I almost cried. I hate crying in front of Sam because of a movie. He's such a "macho man." And I... Well, I am just a pansy.

I can't wait until I have a kid and live through it and can glare at him if he ever calls me a pansy again.

Our car in the last three days has had about $1200 worth the work done on it. Needless to say, Sam and I are poor again. We managed to get a $500 Kelly Tire loan which needs to be paid off in June, and it wouldn't be difficult if we didn't need to pay for rent, $247 car insurance, and food every month. Our combined phone bill of $90 doesn't help either. I could blame him, but I won't for two reasons. It's his money to begin with, and when he spends it sometimes it's for me too.

My time is up, but I don't want to stop writing. I might get to a friends house today and write more. I still need to look up jobs and so on and so forth. Hurray-Hurrah. :-P

COMMENTS:
Anonymous) wrote:

Mar. 21st, 2004 11:59 pm (local)
Hey hun, sounds like it has been an intersting week. I like your comment about having a kid and living through it though. lol. I use being pregnant as an excuse for just about everything in the book. This is me... "I'm pregnant, I'm entitled to be crabby whenever I want to be." lol. Cute, huh? Anyway - take care!

-Jen

summer_mommy wrote:

Mar. 22nd, 2004 05:11 am (local)
I finally joined lj, Amy. I still have my tod but I thought I'd get an lj too since everyone seems to be getting one lately. Just thought you might wanna know.