In Cali and Doing Fine... (For the Most Part)

Hey to those of you I haven't said hey to in a while. I'm writing a rushed entry right now because it's my 14 year old brother-in-laws bed time and the computer is in his room. Anyway, the trip to Cali was eventful and long and all that fun stuff and since I've been here my baby has been a royal pain. I've been in the hospital three different times and I have a second doctor's appointment since I've been here tomorrow. Happy birthday Alicia and Julia if you're reading this. I'm sorry I couldn't call anyone. Sam's cell is usually highly guarded and out of my reach, my cell's not in service right now and I don't want to rack up the phone bill for Sam's parents. But yeah, the most I can say right now about the baby is that he seems to want to come early and everyone is doing everything they can to hold him off so I'm on modified bed rest and a bunch of medicines. Oh what fun it all is. I'll write more as soon as I can.

Sometimes Life Hurts.

A little more than a week ago I found out some disturbing information in regards to my husband and his relationship with me. Anyway, two nights ago I didn't cry at all and last night I cried very little and managed to write a poem, but all of it is so stressful. The friends I have that know what's going on all seem to think I'm stupid for staying with him. It's not easy for me to stay with him, but it wouldn't be easy for me to leave him either. I don't know, even the married ones are apathetic to my situation. When I got married though I took MY vows seriously. Even if Sam didn't, I did. And I think that sticking to them would be the only way I could continue to feel like a decent person. If the situation gets out of control I will probably leave... Many people would say that it's out of control now, but I am handling it. I wish that there was a certain way to feel about everything. It would be great to have a book that's a how to on what to feel and when to feel it and also how to react. The movers are going to be at my house in four days. I'm leaving in eight. My friends and current surroundings are going to change and this is a time when I really need security in something. I am SO glad I'm on a "mood stabalizer".


COMMENTS:
summer_mommy wrote:

Oct. 4th, 2004 09:29 am (local)

Wow hun. I don't don't know what's going on, but it doesn't sound nice. :o( If you need to talk, you know how to reach me! *hugs*

(Anonymous) wrote:

Oct. 18th, 2004 08:33 am (local)

It's Michelle Dunphy from FDL here. I'm sorry I haven't emailed you back. Life has been crazy.

I just wanted to check up on you since I don't have LJ anymore..and I saw this entry. Sweetheart, I know you and I never knew each other that well through HS, but from one young wife to another... You can always talk to me. *hug* I'm sorry you're going through a hard time. I hope everything will turn out alright.

vivrelavie wrote:

Oct. 18th, 2004 09:10 am (local)

It's Michelle.

I gave in. I'm back on LJ. But a very private journal with a very small friends list ... so I can keep in touch better!

Time Flys-

Yesterday I got the info for the place I want to move to in Cali. Now I have to fill out two applications and send them back along with application fees. Before I can do all of that I have to print out Sam's LES. (For those of you unfamiliar with the military that is his paycheck stub basically.) Today he has duty so I won't see him until tomorrow. He's got this hella big party planned and the way it sounds there's going to be A LOT of sailors at my house. I'm not especially looking forward to it. I want to see our friends, I just don't want them drunk and stumbling all over my apartment. Anyway it's a day less than a month now until Sam and I are due to be at his parents house. I'm really excited. I feel somewhat unprepared though. I don't even know what day the moving company is coming. The only thing I'm sure of is Sam and I need to be out of our current apartment by October 12th. Ay, ay, ay. I need to take a break and breathe.

The Joys of Moving...

It's that time of year again where I get to check out bunches of apartments and guess which one is in the best neighborhood and will best suit the needs of the Green family. Hurray. :P
I've got just over a month before leaving for sunny California. I'm incredibly excited, but also incredibly stressed. I've got it narrowed down to two apartments. Now I need to make a couple of calls, hopefully get a couple of answers and then I can choose just one! Sam and I aren't fighting anymore,which is wonderful and I have the car for the day, which is also wonderful. I'm beggining to wonder what the heck I'm doing at the library when I'm practiacally starving. I had an appointment at 10:00am and only had a banana and a fig bar before going. I'm very hungry, but nothing really sounds appetizing. What will I do!?!?! I'm sure I'll figure something out. My next doctors appointment is in two days! Yay! I get to drink and icky orange drink and have somebody poke at me. :P Well I think I might go eat. Adios!


COMMENTS:
hypersparkle wrote:

Sep. 16th, 2004 05:25 am (local)

Amy? I don't know if you'll remember me, but I graduated in 2001. I went to Sabish and then Goodrich (well for me) with you! I was involved with theatre a bit through HS. My name back then was Michelle Sullivan (my brother was in your class).
I saw your post on the FDL livejournal and thought I'd get in touch! I'm married now too (been married for almost 2 years...) and I'm in Michigan. :)

yoshi_rose wrote:

Sep. 16th, 2004 08:48 am (local)

Hey Shelli!

I remember you! Are you married to someone from Wisconsin? Where do you live in Michigan? You should e-mail me. :-) It's great to hear from you.

drama221@yahoo.com

Baby Madness!

Right now I'm at Jessica's watching her three little ones and and her friend's little one. I got here about an hour ago and the three oldest are in bed on their way to sleep. I have The Prince and Me to watch and the cute little newborn to cuddle with. Sam stayed at a friend's last night to think and when he came home I believe he apologized the best he knows how. Which is good enough for me. I'm really glad that he did that. We bought a few movies while at the video store, upon Sam's wishes. I don't think we have the money for it, but hey maybe Sam knows something I don't. We had Taco Bell for dinner which is always wonderful. Tomorrow is a duty day and as usual I am not looking forward to that. I know I'll survive, especially since I'm babysitting Jess's kids again, but I really love having him around when he's in a good mood. Alright, I'm going to order some pictures off of yahoo now. :-)

Something to do.

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Life Sucks!

Hey! Don't take my subject as anything horrible, I just haven't been feeling great lately. From reading another one of my friends journal entries and knowing how people around me act I think it might have something to do with the time of year... Maybe. For me it might have something to do with that and it does have something to do with a lot of other things. Due to issues in my relationship with Sam I am incredibly stressed, adding to that is the stress of being pregnant, moving, and being financially unstable. Sure Sam has a regular income but bills are inconsistant and right now we have more than we can handle, at least more than I can handle. I've been emotionally unstable since Sunday, more so since Tuesday. Thanks to a lot of understanding friends I haven't totally lost it, but there's still time. I know everyone has problems and that eventually my problems will pass and I'll have a whole set of new obstacles, but right now I don't like what's set in front of me and I don't know how to deal with it. I guess I'm just surviving and I can't expect anymore of myself at the moment. Hopefully my next journal entry is more upbeat. I apologize to any of you who don't like reading depressed entries, but the fact is parts of life are depressing. At least I feel like there's still some hope for the future. So, all is not lost.


COMMENTS:
summer_mommy wrote:

Sep. 2nd, 2004 05:29 am (local)

I share your sentiments, hun. You're right, some parts of life do really suck, but most of them do pass with time. Once you have that little baby in your arms, it's all going to be worth the hassle. :o)